When is a Spoof Not a Spoof?

That is the question. We are going to believe that the following article is meant ‘in jest’, is just a ‘funny’ article that some no brained, vaccine loving, 100% Monsanto addicted groupie thought up whilst off his head on PCP and alcohol. See how that ‘humor’ can be  contagious in the right hands?

That is truly the only thing we can think of that might explain why this article was posted on March 5, 2016 on USA Politics Today.

And even if it was a spoof story there are so many things wrong with it, that we don’t really know where to begin. We guess citing the source of the article as being Fox News is meant to give it some kind of credibility? This story is not on the Fox News website, there is no link to the original in the Politics Today article and probably for good reason. Even they have standards, shocking as that sounds. Fox News wouldn’t touch this with a ten foot barge pole. We think they got their ‘bits’ of information from this Fox News interview with Mrs Trump and then decided to have a little ‘fun’ with it:

Melania Trump: ‘My Husband Knows What He Can Do for America’

‘Melania Trump went “On the Record” tonight for her first Fox News interview.

The prospective first lady told Greta Van Susteren that her husband doesn’t sleep much because he’s so excited about his campaign.

“He knows what he can do for America,” the former model said. “He knows what America can be. And he’s an amazing negotiator, leader, communicator. He’s the only one who could bring America to the next level.”

She called Trump’s decision to run a “selfless act,” saying that he gave up a comfortable future with his family so that he could lead his country.’

Perhaps this is an April Fools prank? Yes in March. Yes on the 5th, why not?  Thing is, it does not matter. If we came into your circle and said something like: Your poor mum. Imagine not having any kids that survived, you would rightly be upset. Does it make a difference if I said ‘just joking’ or not? NO! What about if I didn’t say I was joking, just walked away? You would be pretty pissed right? Of course you would.

Which is what makes this article all the more unbelievable. Let’s say it IS a joke, who is the butt of this joke? Well that is not really clear. Michelle Obama? Melania Trump? Donald Trump? American people in general? Well it seems like the answer to that question is E: All of The Above.

You can find the link to that article here, but that is not enough for us. It is possible that the article was intended to be serious, or it might be that it is all part of the Trump smear campaign and might be removed. Don’t you worry though, because we are certainly not going to let that happen:

1Right, obvious question: What did Michael say about Melania?

1aOh. Dear. Lord. Michael, what were you THINKING? No don’t answer that. It is very clear you were thinking improper thoughts about another man’s wife. Incidentally, we have not been able to find any evidence to support the claims that Michael Obama actually said any of these things, or even if they were directed at Melania Trump. If you can find that evidence, please send it to us and we will use it.

Hang on though? Did Melania do porn? Who said this?

Glenn Beck attacks Melania Trump as a Lesbian Porn Star?

Ah! Glenn Beck said it. But he is normally so reasonable and level headed, isn’t he?

15 Stupidest Glenn Beck Quotes Of All Time

“When I see a 9/11 victim family on television, or whatever, I’m just like, ‘Oh shut up’ I’m so sick of them because they’re always complaining.”

Oh. Okay. Well then, never mind.

Interestingly enough, that was also posted on USA Politics Today, which we think should change its name to The USA’s Loonies of Today, way back in the day when they were sane enough to acknowledge certain facts like:

‘the problem is that this claim is not verified. We searched and searched for articles to back up Becks claim, and were unable to find any except from one 2007 post from an unpopular celebrity gossip website called Omgblog.com. Nice try Glenn.’

Which really makes you wonder what policies were changed from the posting of that article, which was 9 weeks before yesterday’s bitchfest, to the one above it?

So it makes you wonder, if they have already admitted there is no proof of Glenn Becks wishful fantasies and they have enough integrity to acknowledge the authenticity or therein lack of, how the heck they came up with this:

3a

Where is the ‘we can not find any evidence of this…’ disclaimer now? Still it is all under the name of Fox News of course, that will keep it classy and no responsibility can be held, should there be any kind of lawsuit perhaps following on from it. I have no idea what I am supposed to feel more angry about? That The USA’s Loonies of Today have degraded a lovely and successful businesswoman who has not done a thing wrong to nothing more than cheap porn mag material, to the complete and utter racist overtones that Melania’s first language is not English (or even ‘American’. I will just leave that there for a second) and therefore does not qualify her to be first lady (because that position is really only applicable to black people and rapist loving manipulative shills), the fact that The USA’s Loonies of Today are making the American people look like racist, sexist wankers (literally) going full retard, or that in some way The USA’s Loonies of Today seem to have decided this is the definition of humor?

This is not funny! This is extremely sad actually. That the ONLY thing these morons understand is that the ‘tits n ass’ mags are more popular than political viewpoints, so therefore if you can not beat them, might as well join ’em, right? That reducing a young woman with clearly more moral fiber in her little finger to this level purely because she speaks 5 languages and ‘American’ (you real life actual spanner!) was not the one she was born with?

To The USA’s Loonies of Today, we would like to point out that your satirical portrait of what you think your version of a Trump supporter would sound like, is only reflecting what the rest of the world think Americans are actually like. Uneducated, ignorant, self centered, superficial buffoons. Way to feed the stereotype there.

Melania Trump (born Melanija Knavs, April 26, 1970; Germanized to Melania Knauss) is a jewelry and watch designer and former model. She is married to American billionaire real estate developer and 2016 U.S. presidential candidate Donald Trump. Born in Yugoslavia (now Slovenia), she became a permanent resident of the United States in 2001 and acquired citizenship in 2006.

Knauss grew up in a modest apartment in a concrete housing block. When she was a teenager, the family moved to a two-story house near Sevnica. She began her modeling career at age 16, and at age 18 signed with a modeling agency in Milan, Italy. She is fluent in Slovenian, English, French, Serbian, and German.’ Wikipedia.

Try it, you might learn something.

3b

After moving to New York City in 1996, Knauss met Donald Trump at a Fashion Week party in New York City in September 1998. After becoming engaged in 2004, Donald Trump and Melania Knauss were married on January 22, 2005. – Wikipedia.

Again. Fancy that.

Fast Track? She arrived in 1996, met Trump two years later and then married him 7 years after that, so in total a mere 9 YEARS later. Yep that is fast, damn near British Rail fast. This, coming from a country that is proud to have invented ‘Drive Thru Wedding Chapels’.

And of course, it is very much common knowledge that if you want to meet ‘Eastern European underwear models’, there really is only one place to go – NEW YORK CITY! No really, the place is full of them, you can’t move without some gorgeous fit looking foreign bird in her skimpies, throwing herself at you.

homelessness-increase-new-york-city

So here is the thing. Whilst we highly doubt the article in question was meant to be satirical humor, even if it was, it was done in a highly offensive and degrading manner. If it was supposed to be funny, then that is even worse. That clearly shows the agenda of groups like this. It seems anything is fair game. You berate a woman for not having English as her first language whilst ignoring that fact that most Americans don’t either. Even though she has worked all her life, which most Americans haven’t, worked up the ladder to become her own boss, you still feel inclined to reduce her to nothing more than a walking sperm depository, an object which in effect has demeaned women in all walks of life. The achievers, the professionals, even those who actually support your sorry asses. If you look good you are an object and therefore a target for hate and if you don’t? you are nobody, but that just means you are not going to be demeaned in print, you are just going to be demeaned by those followers who agree with our view on what we think women are, whores. Great choices there, well done.

We really don’t know which theory we wish was true. Spoof or real? They are both as bad, disgusting and demeaning as each other, but at least, if it is ‘humor’ you can say ‘sorry, bad taste, regrettable, people fired’, but the damage is still done. And USA Politics Today won’t even take the credit for their work.

4aYou know, sometimes the rest of the world believe you Americans get exactly what you deserve, nothing more and definitely nothing less. You pile on the disgust and the outright immoral mockery, at your own expense and then moan and bitch when it backfires. Raise your standards America. You are better than this. Or maybe you are not.

You have a woman who fixes the first round of caucuses with 6 coin tosses, all in her favor. She is still in the race.

The same woman gives away States Secrets to anyone who sends her a couple of bucks or an email. She is still in the race.

She is about to be indicted by the FBI. She is still in the race.

Her husband is proven to not only be a serial rapist, but a pedophile as well. She is still in the race.

In the second round of Caucuses, an old guy won that one fair and square (the same guy who just happened to have lost 6 consecutive coin tosses in the first round), but because Corporations are paying for her political ‘favors’, she ‘won’ instead.

And she is STILL in the race!

You have a guy in the race, who openly eats his own boogers. Another guy who can’t seem to stop staring at another mans ‘bits’ long enough to realize he said the same damn thing a million times, a guy who is quite happy to be seen publicly as your best friend today and your worst enemy tomorrow, and a guy who has been receiving back handers in an education scam that he is doing his level best to keep quiet (erm…oops?).

Ah, decisions, decisions. It’s a tough choice America. God forbid you should say no to any one of these real beauties. As it seems you can have a Canadian President, why don’t you save yourself all this time and bother and just elect Rob Ford? At least all his business is out in the open already. How could you pick worse?

But don’t worry about any of that will you, because look! I got a picture of a bird with her jugs all out in the open:

 

 

Jug1

What do you think? Are you proud to be an American today?

Drop us a line at: contact@notapoliticalbeast.com

Or leave us a message in the comments below.

Post Categories: Crazy Ideas, Politics, Un-natural Disasters
Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Leave a Reply

%d bloggers like this: